Humor is subjective, right? Some people think vintage “Three Stooges” movies are the height of hilarity. Some people think the recent “Three Stooges” movie is the funniest thing ever. (In theory — we don’t know any personally, but we’re sure they exist.) But even subjectivity has its limits. Some comedies are so tragically unfunny that most, if not all, of us can agree on their awfulness. We asked Jenni Miller, Max Evry and Elisabeth Rappe — some of the funniest people we know — to rate the 50 worst offenders in the Bad Comedy Hall of Fame.
50. ‘The Ugly Truth’ (2009)
Katherine Heigl is a TV producer whose only characteristics are typical Career Woman tropes: brittle, unfunny, sexually unfulfilled, etc. Gerard Butler plays a piggish TV personality who promises two things: if she follows his advice, she’ll land her sexy surgeon neighbor, and if his advice works, she’ll have to suck it up and continue working with him. Ostensibly, this is a romantic comedy; realistically, it’s a frightening look at what some people think relationships between heterosexual men and women look like. That it was written by three women is mind-boggling. — Jenni Miller

49. ‘The Pink Panther’ (2006)
A terrible remake is sad enough, but when you have a talented cast comprised of Steve Martin, Kevin Kline, Jean Reno, Emily Mortimer and even Beyoncé Freaking Knowles, it’s time to hide the razor blades. Who gives a crap about the pinkest, most famous diamond in the world when we have to watch a genius like Steve Martin pratfall his way through this forgettable mess? — JM

48. ‘Strange Wilderness’ (2008)
Director/co-writer Fred Wolf and writer Peter Gaulke spent several years writing for “Saturday Night Live,” so it’s easy to imagine that this movie was conceived late at night in the middle of a writing jag where you think everything is really, really funny, probably because you’re high. (By you, we mean Wolf and Gaulke.) In fact, this movie is so dumb that stoners should be offended. Picture the worst, most half-assed “SNL” sketches combined with the sort of R-rated humor that Lorne would never allow. Add in so many penis jokes that there’s even a character named Dick. And then there’s the turkey… Let’s not even talk about the turkey. Oscar nominee Jonah Hill, Justin Long and Steve Zahn (who can occasionally be really good in dramas) star. — JM

47. ‘Stealing Harvard’ (2002)
There was a short window of time in the mid- to late ’90s when Tom Green was thought of as funny. “Stealing Harvard” was after this period. If you can stomach Green for more than five seconds, you will find yourself wondering how someone with credits like Peter Tolan (“Murphy Brown,” “The Larry Sanders Show,” “Rescue Me”) could write this screenplay, or what the hell someone like Richard Jenkins is doing in a movie like this. To add insult to injury, “Kids in the Hall” alum Bruce McCulloch directed. — JM

46.  ’Nothing But Trouble’ (1991)
Before Dan Aykroyd began shilling vodka or desperately trying to convince people that a “Ghostbusters” reunion would happen, he co-wrote, directed and appeared in this stinker. Nothing could possibly salvage this movie with its grotesque rubbery makeup, John Candy paying his own twin sister, and totally dumb premise — not even a musical appearance by Digital Underground. Not even Tupac could save this movie! – JM

45. ’Last Action Hero’ (1993)
While the idea of taking the “Purple Rose of Cairo” concept of a movie character wandering into our world and placing it in an action film context sounded smart, it couldn’t have been executed any dumber. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Jack Slater, a stereotypical tough cop who’s transported via magic ticket into reality, and while the action is staged ludicrously over-the-top by bonafide blockbuster director John McTiernen (“Die Hard”), it feels like the same joke with increasingly more exclamation points. Movie in-jokes about “Amadeus” and Ingmar Bergman feel weirdly out of place, as do vanity cameos and a shameless plug for Planet Hollywood. — Max Evry

44. ‘Disaster Movie’ (2008)
Most anything can be funny in the hands of a talented writer, but unfortunately none were around to write this movie about stupid natural disasters and almost every superhero ever, from Batman to Justin Timberlake. If your cast includes Vanessa Lachey, Kim Kardashian and Carmen Electra, chances are very good you have a disaster on your hands. — JM

43. ’I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry’ (2007)
There is a touching, progressive and sensitive movie buried in “Chuck and Larry.” Really. The two characters start out as homophobic, but after life sees them marrying each other, they’re forced to change their tune, and their sham marriage creates a ripple effect of tolerance throughout their fire station. (One even comes out of the closet alongside them.) As Adam Sandler films go, it’s surprisingly mature, kind and perceptive. How else would two homophobic men act if trying to feign gay marriage? As clumsy and stereotypical as these two. It’s a story that should mesh well with Sandler’s crass, immature humor. Sadly, it just doesn’t click. – Elisabeth Rappe

42.  ’Howard the Duck’ (1986)
By the mid-’80s, George Lucas could do no wrong, having sired both “Star Wars” and “Indiana Jones,” but the bearded one discovered that he wasn’t made out of Teflon after all when he laid this rotten egg. Based on the cult comic book published by Marvel (yes, this is the first Marvel movie) about a wisecrackin’, cigar chompin’ duck who crash lands on our planet, the satirical appeal of the ’70s series is lost amid attempts to shoehorn in “Ghostbusters”-style special effects and a creepy love story between Lea Thompson’s ’80s rocker and several midgets wearing the Howard costume. — ME

41.  ’Caddyshack II’ (1988)
Hey, we’ve got an idea: Let’s take everything we loved about “Caddyshack” (Bill Murray’s brilliant improvs, Rodney Dangerfield’s slovenly wisecracks) and chuck them out. What do we put in their place? Annoying borscht belt comedian Jackie Mason, and the literal moment when Dan Aykroyd stopped being funny. Needless to say, this severely handicapped (pun intended) this film’s game, and both screenwriter Harold Ramis and co-star Chevy Chase would later trash the finished film, which would derail fan hopes for “Caddyshack III: Back in Shacktion.” — ME

40. ‘All About Steve’ (2009)
Somewhere, a scriptwriter sat down with a copy of “Play Misty For Me,” and wondered what would happen if you made it into a romantic comedy. The result is “All About Steve,” which proves adding a cute hamster and a chirpy who-needs-guys ending just won’t remove the terror that comes from relentless stalking. It’s a testament to Bradley Cooper’s charm and work ethic that the long-shelved film didn’t sink his fledgling stardom. Other up-and-coming hunks haven’t been so lucky. — ER

39. ‘The Bounty Hunter’ (2010)
Remember when Gerard Butler was funny and sexy in “RockNRolla” or badass in “300?? Yeah, it’s all a bit foggy now, isn’t it? He dons yet another bad American accent to play the eponymous bounty hunter whose latest target is his neurotic ex-wife, who is played by Jennifer Aniston. In this tired romcom, she’s a reporter in high heels whose career aspirations ruined their marriage. (But also maybe his drinking and gambling problems contributed to that?) And then there’s some stuff about criminals and whatnot, but it’s mostly just an excuse to show Aniston handcuffed to various things. They get back together, the end. — JM

38. ‘That’s My Boy’ (2012)
Dear Lord, Adam Sandler is taking Andy Samberg with him into the hole of terrible Happy Madison productions. Andy, no! Not okay! Sandler plays a hot mess of a dad who fathered his son Todd (Samberg) when he was 13 with his super hot older teacher, because pedophilia is okay when it’s with boys, right? (Answer: No! Not okay!) Barf and other bodily fluids of an R-rated nature are the meat and potatoes of this story, with a tiny kernel of father-son bonding to attempt some sort of plot. It’s beyond us why anyone would want to try and salvage a relationship with this poopy pater familias. — JM

37.  ’Little Fockers’ (2010)
The original “Meet the Parents” fun-geneered many laughs from the intimidation game father-in-law Robert De Niro played with soon-to-be son-in-law Ben Stiller, while “Meet the Fockers” brought in ringers Dustin Hoffman and Barbara Streisand as Stiller’s hilariously liberated folks. By the time this threequel rolled around, a blistering fatigue had clearly set in, compounded by the fact that once-sterling thesps De Niro and Hoffman had by then abandoned anything remotely close to giving a s**t. Forced set pieces involving Stiller’s kiddies and a flirtatious woman (Jessica Alba) prove that you can’t squeeze blood from a turnip. Please no “Fockers Four.” — ME

36. ‘Junior’ (1994)
Ronald Reagan might have costarred with a monkey, but Governator Arnold Schwarzenegger one-upped him by playing a pregnant man. Who is also a gynecologist, which is a horrific mental image for anyone who’s ever put her feet in those cold, cold stirrups. He also finds out that being a woman is hard! Who’s the baby now, Ah-nold? — JM

35. ‘Evan Almighty’ (2007)
This sorta-sequel to “Bruce Almighty” posits that Steve Carell is a Congressman (what?) who has to build an ark for the big flood a-comin’. Because what’s funnier than the human race being wiped out except for some shmucks and animals combined with government humor? Morgan Freeman’s “God” shtick has worn out its welcome. — JM

34. ’Who’s That Girl’ (1987)
Madonna had a brief identity crisis for a decade or so: She thought she could act. While the Material Girl pulled in record business for her “Who’s That Girl” world tour, the movie she built it around turned out to be a massive dud. She plays an eccentric con artist who was sent to prison for four years for a crime she didn’t commit, and when she gets out, she commits a multitude of crimes to prove her innocence. Screwball comedy ensues, including liberal use of a cougar and Griffin Dunne, but there’s a very low laughter yield. Supposedly Madonna refused to do more than one take for most scenes, and it shows. — ME

33. ’The Stupids’ (1996)
Somewhere between destroying both the “Beverly Hills Cop” and “Blues Brothers” names with horrendous sequels, the once-brilliant director John Landis (“Animal House,” “Coming to America”) made this bizarre “kids movie” that truly lives up to its name. Tom Arnold plays Stanley Stupid, the patriarch of a family of bizarrely warped people whose perspective on the world (they interpret a “Return to Sender” stamp on a letter literally, into a vast government conspiracy) would make you think they were burned out Vietnam vets if they didn’t wear such clean clothes. The film’s one left-field bright spot comes when Arnold sings a toe-tapping rendition of “I’m My Own Grandpa.” — ME

32. ’Envy’ (2004)
Ben Stiller was coming off the success of “Meet the Parents” and “The Royal Tenenbaums,” while Jack Black just scored his first major box-office home run with “School of Rock.” It sounded like a dynamite pairing, but even with Academy-Award-winner Barry Levinson at the helm this movie is almost perplexingly dismal. The premise of Black inventing a spray that makes dog doo vanish (“Vapoorize”) is already kinda desperate, but Stiller’s steady decline throughout the picture is just sad. “Envy” sat on a shelf for two years, writer Larry David took his name off, and after it was released Jack Black publicly apologized for it. — ME

31. ’Wild Wild West’ (1999)
Coming off their wildly successful pairing in the first “Men in Black,” Will Smith and director Barry Sonnenfeld decided to use the wacky ’60s sci-fi western TV show for a victory lap. What they wound up with was this fetid pile of horse manure, hindered further by the fact that Smith and co-star Kevin Kline failed to capture the same chemistry he shared with Tommy Lee Jones. In fact, Kline seems downright embarrassed. Gay jokes, slavery jokes, and black and Mexican jokes aplenty, but nary a laugh to be found. — ME

30. ’Town & Country’ (2001)
This woebegone comedy bomb began filming in summer 1998, and spent three tortured years making it to the screen, where it was greeted about as warmly as a skinhead at a bar mitzvah. Warren Beatty plays an architect on an infidelity streak who gets into all kinds of ridiculous situations in pursuit of middle-aged tail. If that doesn’t sound like an awesome date movie, perhaps co-stars Garry Shandling, Charlton Heston, and Diane Keaton will get your motor running. Because this film started with an unfinished script, went through numerous reshoots, and relied heavily on (pretty lame) improvisation, it feels like separate Woody Allen, Mike Nichols, and Rob Reiner movies all mashed together into one grotesque Frankencomedy. — ME

29. ’Year One’ (2009)
Don’t get us wrong, Harold Ramis remains one of the unquestioned gods of comedy, and we will continue to chisel a Greek statue in his honor for hallowed work on “Animal House,” “Ghostbusters,” and “Groundhog Day”… but that is no excuse for this prehistoric pile of putridity. Jack Black and Michael Cera play simple villagers who venture out into the big bad world where they encounter Biblical figures like Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, and (for the audience) boredom and malaise. — ME

28. ‘Who’s Your Caddy?’ (2007)
There’s probably a really vicious comedy to be made about the racism and classicism found in our nation’s country clubs, and how ridiculous such notions are in the 21st century. “Caddy” isn’t it. All of its finest moments are ripped off “Caddyshack,” and the gaps are filled with fat jokes, sexist leering, sterotypes of all stripes, and the occasional hip-hop track. If you are going to rip off “Caddyshack” (and you shouldn’t), you need to do it better than this. — ER

27. ’Rhinestone’ (1984)
Gotta hand it to Sylvester Stallone, the guy has many talents, but singing sure ain’t one of ‘em. In this legendary disaster Dolly Parton makes a bet with her manager that she can turn anyone into a country singing sensation in two weeks, and that’s where Sly comes in. During his first number, the hilariously garbled “Drinkinstein,” the “Rocky” star comes out swinging because his badness works to his comic advantage, but later on towards the end when he’s supposed to be awesome the singing is just as bad! — ME

26. ‘Little Man’ (2006)
Remember how funny and awesome “In Living Color” was? This movie, written by Keenen Ivory Wayans, Shawn Wayans and Marlon Wayans will make you forget all about it. If the image of Marlon Wayans as a small person dressed as a toddler isn’t nightmare fodder, perhaps the idea of him as a jewel thief posing as some desperate couple’s baby is upsetting enough? — JM

25. ‘Gigli’ (2003)
Ah, yes. The famous Bennifer bomb. Sexism, an ongoing joke about a mentally disabled fellow obsessed with “Baywatch,” and the good old “converting a badass sexy lesbian to heterosexuality” storyline makes this indisputably unfunny and often listed as one of the worst movies of all time. Which is pretty astounding if you take a look at the rest of this list. — JM

24. ‘American Pie Presents’ … anything
Look, sticking your wang in an apple pie was funny once, but these endless direct-to-DVD movies are simply an affront to anyone with a diaphragm. How many desperate virgins do we really need movies about? How much money does Eugene Levy really need? How craven are the people who unleashed these formulaic comedies on the world? We are having an existential crisis now. — JM

23. ’Dr. Seuss’ The Cat in the Hat’ (2003)
Mike Myers seemed poised to take his place as the Gen X answer to Peter Sellers, when he seemed to make a conscious decision to start biting it onscreen. This film is perhaps more odious than the dreaded “Love Guru” because it took a classic piece of children’s literature and smeared it with Myers’ pop culture banality. Did we really need to see Martha Stewart jokes and tons of product placement? Given that it’s directed by ace production designer Bo Welch, the film looks amazing, but the content and performances are enough to make Dr. Seuss spin in his twisty, striped, multi-colored grave. — ME

22. ‘Little Nicky’ (2000)
Give Adam Sandler a CGI budget, and you wind up with “Little Nicky.” It’s crass and loud, it wastes Harvey Keitel and Reese Witherspoon, and Sandler’s shrill voice begs for the mute button. What jokes it has are used up so fast that “Nicky” quickly wears out its welcome. But at least it’s a coherent plot about the Devil and his unruly sons, and the ending really does line up everything it’s thrown at the screen. That sounds like faint praise, but compared to the convoluted messes on this list, “Little Nicky” looks like “The Master and Margarita.” — ER

21. ’Leonard Part 6? (1987)
We have many Razzie Winners on this list, but only this Bill Cosby vanity vehicle could have earned a coveted nomination in their Worst “Comedy” of Our First 25 Years category. It follows a former CIA superspy name Leonard Parker who has to save the world from evil vegetarians. He has a Porsche fitted like a tank, takes showers in Perrier, and floods the bad guy base with Alka-Seltzer. Hil-ar-ious! Apparently Cosby wrote the film by his kitchen cupboard. — ME

20. ‘Freddy Got Fingered’ (2001)
Many revere “Freddy Got Fingered” as a surreal and manic masterpiece that slipped by the shackles of the studio system. There are moments when it’s not hard to laugh at it’s disgusting, relentless audacity as hideous gags fly in from nowhere, unconnected to plot, taste, logic, or sanity. (The stud farm springs to mind. Where did it come from in the filmmaking process? Do we even want to know?) But try as we might, imagining Tom Green as some kind of ersatz David Lynch can’t truly scrub the terrible out of this movie. It doesn’t even encourage multiple viewings. Let’s stop kidding ourselves. It’s weirdly fascinating, but it’s bad. — ER

19. ‘Vampires Suck’ (2010)
Yes, it’s yet another Friedberg and Seltzer pop culture cash grab. Strangely, “Vampires Suck” is their most mature offering to date. Instead of being a manic mash-up of entertainment references, “Suck” sticks so closely to the “Twilight” plot that we’re tempted to think Friedberg and Seltzer are attempting to move into Mel Brooks territory.
But where Brooks was be able to script parody out of genuine love and knowledge of his subject, Friedberg and Seltzer are content to just retell “Twilight” with awful jokes. The result is so dreary that you actually wish it would be as noisy and crass as their other work. And then you hate yourself for the thought. — ER

18. ‘The Cookout’ (2004)
This movie is supposed to be about how even if you start earning eleventy billion dollars playing basketball you should still value your family and stuff even if they embarrass you when you’re trying to land an endorsement deal that will make you even more money. Will basketball player Todd Andersen (rapper Storm P) remember his roots or get too big for his britches? The family cookout is a chance for his worlds to collide with unfunny results, ranging from Ja Rule as a “thug” named Bling Bling who wants to sell signed sneakers on eBay to Farrah Fawcett and Danny Glover as a snooty married couple who eventually learn to let their hair down. The movie has six credited writers, including Queen Latifah, who appears as a tough security guard. Totally undercooked. — JM

17. ‘Soul Plane’ (2004)
This is supposed to be hilarious because it’s about an airline owned by black people, so it’s totally okay to make as many racist jokes as you want. Let’s start with the fat and sassy, sexually dominating female security guard played by Mo’Nique? Then there’s the plane tricked out like a lowrider. And for our finishing touch, so to speak, there’s the “player” blind guy who lets his fingers do the walking — right into a baked potato. And Tom Arnold. — JM

16. ‘Jack and Jill’ (2011)
When do you know you’ve failed at a comedy? When people think your trailer is so bad that it can’t possibly be a real film, but is viral marketing for a smarter, sharper movie that stars Al Pacino. But it’s not, and we’re convinced this is proof of a Bizarro World, one where Pacino is a washed up comedic actor scraping the barrel for paychecks. The real Pacino, the one from “The Godfather,” is trapped there and trying to find his way back. We have to help him. Maybe doing so will erase “Jack and Jill” from this universe. — ER

15. ‘Epic Movie’ (2007)
We haven’t figured out what cinematic crime we committed to be punished by the comedies of Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, but after “Epic Movie,” we realized we were in for a long sentence. It’s called a parody film, but that’s too grand a word for the barrage of entertainment references that are come screeching through the screen. Neither Jack Sparrow, Wolverine, or The DaVinci Code are actually lampooned here; they’re just hurled at the screen as a visual cue to keep the emptiness at bay. Guess what? It doesn’t work. And we’d prefer an empty screen. – E.R.

14. ’Date With an Angel’ (1987)
Okay, so you’re going to make a comedy about a guy with a brain tumor who falls in love with an angel. That’s a pretty delicate tightrope to walk, you need someone with a deft comic touch to bring just the right element of class to the proceedings. So who do you hire? How about Tom McLoughlin, the guy who directed “Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives.” The lovely Emmanuelle Béart looks great in wings, but makes annoying squeaks that remind us less of “Splash” and more of a dying dolphin. — ME

13. “Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo” (2005)
When a sequel takes six years to get off the ground, you would expect it would have a lot of well-honed humor in it.  But “European Gigolo” has none. In fact, it feels like they scooped all the scenes deemed too lame for the original (haha, a hunchback lady!), glued them together with Rob Schneider’s sweat, gave it a gay panicked storyline, and set it in Amsterdam.   Even the location is weakly used, and expected to be hilarious just by virtue of being Amsterdam. It’s the worst thing a sequel to a gross-out hit can be – boring, and completely reliant on terrible penis jokes. – ER

12. ‘White Chicks’ (2004)
We’re convinced that “White Chicks” began life as a horror flick about two deviants who actually murder two socialites, and take over their lives in order to hunt and kill more blonde heiresses. But then the Wayans Brothers bought it, and said “Let’s take the heroic detectives from the finale, and have them be cops who dress up as their clients. We’ll play them, and hijinks will ensue!” Beucase otherwise, there’s no just no explanation for the horrific make-up, the lack of actual wit, and the convoluted plot that keeps them in drag long past all reason. — ER

11. ‘The Master of Disguise’ (2002)
Dana Carvey co-wrote and stars in this so-called comedy as Pistachio Disguisey, a waiter with secret powers to… disguise himself and do secret agent-y things? This movie will sap your will to live, laugh or love ever again as you watch the otherwise talented Carvey fight ninjas, imitate Tony Montana while holding a shrunken head, transform himself into a creepy turtle-man and don brown makeup to play a snake charmer in a straight-up racist interlude. — JM

10. ‘The Love Guru’ (2008)
Comedies that skewer an entire religion are a tricky thing. They have to either be done with great sensitivity or blistering satire. They can’t go halfway, or they’re “The Love Guru,” a Hindu riff that’s apparently hilarious only to Mike Myers and Deepak Chopra. (The self-help guru inspired the film, and happily plays himself in it.) “Guru” repackages Myers’ old routine under a new costume and rubber nose, and the result makes you realize what a one trick pony he’s always been. Even the charm of Justin Timberlake (and his “Le Coq” is a harbinger of SNL gold) can’t pull “Guru” back from the abyss. — ER

9. ‘The Hottie and the Nottie’ (2008)
What’s that? A Paris Hilton vanity project being cruel, unfunny, and an embarrassing waste of resources? No one could have seen that coming at all … and yet they didn’t, and instead of just rolling an empty camera for Hilton’s pleasure, someone actually scripted and directed “Nottie.” The only joke is an ugly girl, and the film limply runs with her rotten toenails, facial wart, and rotten teeth for 90 minutes. “Nottie” cares so little about life, laughter, love, or anything not Hilton’s pert figure that it doesn’t even bother to have an ending. It just stops at the point where she got bored with the project, and wandered off set, never to return. — ER

8. ‘The Adventures of Pluto Nash’ (2002)
Depending on if you’re adjusting for inflation, this film frequently ranks in the top two or three money losers of all-time. That’s a pretty major distinction for one-time box-office king Eddie Murphy, playing the title impresario whose lunar night club becomes targeted by space Mafioso. Lame jokes involving clones, androids, and money with Hillary Clinton’s face on it (still plausible) did not justify the enormous amount of money lavished on this mornic script. Murphy later admitted to Barbara Walters, “I know the two or three people that liked this movie.” — ME

7. ‘Son of The Mask’ (2005)
Along with “Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd,” this was part of New Line Cinema’s two-pronged attack on the positive vibes associated with early Jim Carrey flicks. As originally conceived in the Dark Horse comics, “The Mask” could latch itself onto anyone, male or female, good or evil, and transform them into a Looney Tunes force of nature. Unfortunately, said mask did not anticipate latching on to someone as utterly devoid of talent or charisma as Jamie Kennedy. — ME

6. ‘Phat Girlz’ (2006)
As romantic comedies go, “Phat Girlz” actually has its heart in the right place. It truly wants to be an empowering fairy tale about beauty, love, and accepting who you are. But one can only watch the leading lady gulp down ice cream, lament her love life, and scream at the handsome doctor so many times before you realize how badly it’s talking down to you, and how shallow the characters really are. When a romance sees snagging a rich, ripped doctor as a greater achievement than a woman starting her own business, well, it’s doing it wrong. — ER

5. ‘Norbit’ (2007)
When Eddie Murphy first donned a fatsuit and layers of latex make-up, it was funny. Several outings and variations later, it became “Norbit,” a film so wretched that it allegedly cost Eddie Murphy an Oscar for “Dreamgirls.” It aims for a cute plot – a nerd reconnects with the girl he loved in an orphanage – but buries the sweet in humor that plays as derogatory and offensive. (Compared to other entries on this list, it’s downright sensitive.) Audiences didn’t agree, and it raked in so much money that Murphy remained king of screechy, latex-laden humor. – ER

4. ‘Meet the Spartans’  (2008)
It’s hard to imagine a world where “Epic Movie” can be considered a good movie. But then came “Meet the Spartans,” and suddenly, “Epic Movie” looked like “Citizen Kane.” At least “Epic” spun an original story of sorts, “Spartans” claims to spoof “300,” but it’s really just another trashbag of pop culture references. Friedberg and Seltzer clearly approach filmmaking like making monster cookies – throw lots of junk food in, and it will make something that’s palatable. That approach works with cookies. It doesn’t work with movies, though you wouldn’t know it from “Spartans” box office returns. — ER

3. It’s Pat  (1994)
There have been many terrible films based on Saturday Night Live skits. In fact, it’s easier just to name the good ones (“Blues Brothers,” “Wayne’s World”… there, that’s it), but this Julia Sweeney-starrer makes “The Ladies Man” look like “Gone With the Wind.” Sweeney reprises her SNL character of Pat, for whom annoying and androgynous are the chief traits. The late Charles Rocket spends most of the movie obsessed with discovering Pat’s true sex, but we mostly sat wondering which dreadful scenes Sweeney’s then-boyfriend Quentin Tarantino wrote (uncredited). — ME

2. ‘Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star’ (2011)
There’s a crumb of a good idea here: Goody-goody Midwesterners are revealed to be 1970s porn stars to the shock and delight of their son. Even Bucky’s stardom – based purely on his unimpressive manbits – could be funny. But “Larson” grinds away all potential it might have had because it’s incredibly inept, coasting along without anything – actor, character, punchline, plot – hitting its mark. Can we stage an intervention for Christina Ricci now? – ER

1. ‘Dumb and Dumber 2: When Harry Met Lloyd’ (2003) 
It took a long time for the world to admit it loved “Dumb and Dumber,” but admit it we did. There was certainly interest in a sequel, and with our two favorite dolts roaming the wild, there was even promising material. Instead, we got that dead end of all creativity — a prequel. Who wanted a prologue to “Dumb and Dumber”? No one. It feels like no one involved did either, as Harry and Lloyd are shoehorned into a jumbled high-school comedy that only has two moments resembling a joke. One of them is Shia LaBeouf being mistaken for a centaur; the other is a toilet gag shamelessly ripped off the original. The whole mess isn’t just unfunny, it’s depressing.