Some people tell me that after their heart has been broken, they can’t eat, they can’t sleep, and their grades start dropping. It’s not an easy journey to move from a broken heart to healing, but it is possible, and it is necessary. You will need to take some hard steps of putting the hurt behind you so you can get on with the rest of your life. I hate to see you suffer, so here are a few tips for moving forward after a broken heart.
5 Ways To Move Ahead
1. Let go of mementos. If you’ve been dating someone a while, you no doubt have collected items that remind you of the one who left you behind. When you were still dating that person, these mementos meant the world to you and had a powerful impact on your emotions. But now, these same mementos only work to break your heart.
These include things like pictures, rings, pillows, music, clothes, etc. Hanging on to reminders of the relationship will get in the way of moving on. Get rid of them. This can be hard to do because there is something very final about throwing them away. You are finally admitting to yourself, “It’s over. It’s truly over.” This is an important step to take.
2. Keep yourself busy by giving to others. When you were dating, you spent hours and hours with your special someone who has broken your heart. Now you have all this time on your hands. People who get over broken hearts find ways to fill that time with something positive. For example, you might want to get to know your friends again. Hanging out with them will help remind you of the good old days before your ex. Or you can get involved in helping organizations like Big Brothers/Big Sisters or volunteer somewhere else. Filling your time with positive activities will both help distract you and help you feel good again.
3. Take care of yourself physically. It is very difficult to overcome a broken heart when you don’t feel good physically. Not feeling well only adds to your depression. When people have their hearts broken, people either tend to quit eating or begin overeating. Sometimes they try to self-medicate through drugs or alcohol. None of this works and usually makes matters far worse.
When we eat right, we have more energy, more endurance, and less mood swings. Getting good exercise actually triggers chemicals in our brain helping to lift our mood. Have a friend to encourage you to exercise and eat right. Soon you will be feeling better, even if you’re not sure why.
4. Realize it’s mostly about you, not your ex. Any event in our lives is just that an event. The issue comes down to how we interpret that event. Two people going through the same type break-up can interpret it and respond to it very differently. So in the end, it comes down to whether you are going to allow this break-up to make you stronger, or stay a victim. It’s no longer about the ex and how horrible they were or what they did. At some point it becomes mostly about you and whether or not you decide to move on.
5. Move on. Finally, that moment comes. Sometimes it creeps up on you. Other times, it’s like a light bulb goes on in your heart and you say to yourself, “It’s time for me to move on. I’m not going to die. The sun will come up tomorrow and I feel myself learning to live without the other person. In fact, I can go a whole day without thinking of him/her.” When that happens, it’s an awesome thing. There’s nothing quite like the realization you have decided to move on.
