Have you been in an abusive relationship, or are you still in one?

When it comes to abuse in romantic relationships, it isn’t always easy to tell whether one of the partners’ behavior is being emotionally damaging towards the other one. Besides, abuse isn’t always physical and loud. Oftentimes, it comes in the form of wicked mind games and intense manipulation. And this manipulation is perhaps the most dangerous kind of abuse because it affects the victim in the long run, and essentially harms their quality of life.

Unfortunately, many people fail to notice their partners’ abusive behavior.

They are somehow blind to the emotional hell they’ve been living in. Therefore, it’s far more difficult for them to free themselves from the horrific impact their manipulative partners have over them.

However, there is still hope for the ones who still can’t realize they are being turned into someone’s victim. No one in this world deserves to be someone’s puppet they can play with whenever they please. And if you have doubts that your partner may be mentally abusing you, you need to stay awake and always be vigilant around them. But first, you would need to get to know the signs of abuse in a relationship.

Here are a few of the most clear-cut signs your partner is silently manipulating you.

1. They are constantly making you feel guilty.

Skillful manipulators know exactly what to say to make their partners feel guilty, even though they are the ones in the wrong. They have the vicious power to convince others that they are the victims and blame the people around them for their own mistakes. Is your partner holding you responsible for all the troubles you have in your relationship? Are they guilting you into thinking you are the only reason for your problems? If your answer is yes, they might be intentionally manipulating you so they can easily control your emotions.

2. They are being rude to you, but never loud.

Raising your voice often displays you’re angry and upset about something. It comes almost natural when you’re fighting over something, especially when you’re absolutely convinced you are right, but the other person undermines you. It’s not something to be proud of, but it’s just how our brains work sometimes. However, such rudeness can be easily disguised with a smooth tone and a hushed volume. Even though your partner may not be raising their voice, be cautious over the content of their words. They might be insulting you without you realizing it. The way your significant other talks to you says a lot about how they feel about you and your relationship.

3. They are usually undermining your opinion.

If your partner is being mentally abusive towards you, they will always find a way to make you feel like your beliefs and your perspective are irrational. Whenever you try to talk to them about an issue in your relationship, they are vigorously trying to convince you, you are just being overly anxious and there’s nothing to worry about. Does this sound familiar?

4. They constantly lower your self-esteem.

Do your partner’s jokes get a little too harsh sometimes? Are they often making you feel bad while they’re ‘just kidding’? If your partner’s humor is mainly sarcastic and based on making jokes about your personal flaws and imperfections, perhaps they’re not just kidding. In fact, through their jokes, they might be expressing their real opinion about you.

5. They never really listen.

Your partner often loses focus when you’re trying to explain something to them. Every time there’s something that’s troubling your mind, and you wish to share it with them, they aren’t paying attention to your words. Moreover, they never remember the things you tell them. It’s a whole miracle if they even remember when your birthday is without you reminding them.

6. They become ignorant when they don’t get what they want.

Whenever you refuse to play by their rules and get them what they want, they get distant and start acting like you don’t exist. Just like little kids when their parents refuse to give them candy before dinner, your partner quickly gives you the cold shoulder when they realize they can’t benefit from you at the moment.

7. They make you fearful of their reactions.

Love should never make you feel afraid of your partner. You should feel safe in their arms and free to be yourself around them. You should never be fearful of how your actions will trigger their reactions. And you should always be able to rely on your significant other and to connect with them on every level possible. But if your partner is constantly making you feel anxious and afraid of them, then your relationship is far from being sustainable and healthy. Therefore, if you believe it’s impossible to be fixed, you need to find a way to safely get out of this abusive relationship, and take your time to heal from it.